It took me far too long to realise that there was only one answer to this question that people wanted to hear. I have worked long and hard to be able to heave “Good” into my mouth. Somewhere along the line I forgot how difficult that was, receiving that bare-faced┬áreminder that, while people were asking, they didn’t actually want to know, or, if they did, they didn’t want to know now.

So this is me reiterating┬áto myself how devastating this question is for some people, and was for me, not an argument for not using it at all. It’s a reminder that, if I am going to ask it, I have to be ready for the person in front of me to crumple in on themselves when they realise they are not okay. I have to be prepared to realise that I’m not okay.

I wish that the social niceties, the lubricant of conversation openings, were as simple as we will them to be.